The Tale of the Tape:
Hailing from Norfolk, VA Age 39 weighing in at 269 steroid using pounds of pure fat transformed muscle they call him Timothy "Timbaland" Mosley
Hailing from Virginia Beach, VA with a combined anorexic weight of 210 pounds those beat machine, keyboard pounding skater boys Pharell Williams and Chad Hugo aka The Neptunes
And our Write In candidate Age 37 hailing from Atlanta, GA weighing in at, it doesn't even matter because he has a generation of men's wifey of his arm and Money Ain't a Thang to Jermaine "JD" Dupri Mauldin
"Ok Gentlemen, this battle is for the supreme title as Producer of the Decade and shall chronicle the triumphs and defeats, peaks and valleys, good, bad, and ugly of the 2000s in your respective careers. This will be a fair fight and everyone leaves on the their feet. Touch beat machines, LET"S GET IT ON!"
2000:
JD comes out swinging first having produced and introducing Jagged Edge and their album JE Heartbreak, now yall know that "Let's Get Married" had all the girls talking bout "I'm a come down the aisle to that song" or "I want my man to propose to me and that song come on" each coming with *two snaps* and a *neck roll* after
Timbaland and The Neptunes ask if he has any other contributions for this year worth noting... no reply from JD so could you please sit your lil ass down thank you very much
Timbaland comes with Phat Rabbit - Ludacris
The Neptunes say Southern Hospitality
Neptunes got that one
Then Tim says aight then whatr about Hey Papi - Jay-Z top that!
The Neptunes say I Just Wanna Love U still in heavy rotation in the club in Miami your song in Milwaukee
Nigga please thats city plus everywhere else just as much as yours
This is a draw
Look "Timbo" '99 was a fantastic year for you we give you that, BUT we talking bout 2000, you in a whole different millennium! Now with the exception of them couple songs you just mentioned we completely smashed you homie, SMASHED! Tim says well...
WELL WHAT?! What else you got that can rival Girls Dem Sugar by Beenie Man, Shake It Fast and Danger by Mystikal, and How Many Licks by Lil Kim? Don't Worry we will wait Timmay... Hell we even hooked Ray J wack ass up with his only "hit" Wait A Minute
Tim stands no match for the barrage of hits The Neptunes pelt him with and returns back to his corner at the end of Round 1.
Y2K, the year of the supposed computer crash, doesn't effect the other worldly gentlemen. 2000 goes to The Neptunes
Stay tuned for more in the fight, it is sure to be a good one!
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